A Brief Update and A Simple Request

Hello Everybody,

This is Elijah addressing you all, not my mother, Jo-Ellen. I would like to begin by thanking both the community and my family for their continued support in these most dire of circumstances. I know it may seem like I am in the background sometimes- having my parents being the one’s who handle everything from dinners to car rides, to a place for me to relax while they go to a doctors appointment, but I see the impact all of the things everyone does for our family, on an almost daily basis, and for that I thank everyone. 

Now it with a lot of despair and regret that I inform you all that my dad’s health has taken an unfortunate turn for the worse. Because of some symptoms we were noticing this past Tuesday in my father, we got concerned there may be liver involvement. Dad went to his doctors appointments the next day, and on that day, after his radiation, which was discontinued because of it’s ineffectiveness, the doctors learned the tumor grew on one side, and shrunk on the other.  It grew on the side where his liver is located. He had an ultrasound of that area, and left for the day with first glance results showing the cancer had not metastasized. Fast forward to Thursday. I came home from school, and my mom sat me down and told me, “The doctors called this morning. Your fathers cancer has metastasized.” So, that is where we stand, the cancer has spread into his liver, the degree to which it has spread remains unknown. He is trying one last chemotherapy treatment, called Bendamustine. There are times now where my father is in a lot of pain, and is very uncomfortable. We are trying to give him as much comfort as we can, which takes me to my next point. 

In order for my dad and myself to be comfortable with everything thats going on, I am asking for just a few basic things. I am asking that, if you plan on visiting, please don’t do so on a whim, call in advance to see how he feels. When put into social situations when in bad pain, he becomes irritable, and this can be avoided. Also important to me, is privacy regarding the situation. I can’t speak for my mother or father, but I would appreciate it if asking me about my dad and his health could be avoided, as I feel it is uncomfortable to discuss. That’s all I ask.

Thanks again for your support,

Elijah

 

A Most Recent and Unfortunate Update

Dearest friends, family, neighbors, supporters and acquaintances,

It has been way too long since I have written, though it is on my mind often.  I will start with the most recent events and then back up for details.  Last Monday, November 10th, Gary had a CT scan.  The previous week he had a number of tests that they have to do within 30 days of a stem cell transplant.  Thursday was the appointment with his oncologist.  They left us waiting for a long time.  When his oncologist came in she was with Aliza Shapiro, the outpatient social worker who has been the only person I actually look forward to seeing in the hospital.  His oncologist pulled no punches.  She sat down and told Gary (she does not even look at me, let alone greet me in any way)  that she had very bad news.  We thought he was in remission, but this type of Non Hodgkins Lymphoma was very, very aggressive, and the tumor had tripled in size in the last few weeks.  They are going to put him back in the hospital on Tuesday for three days of a new chemo protocol.  In for three days, home for eleven.  I believe she said they would do three cycles of this.  Gary asked how long he would have if he didn’t take the chemo.  Her direct answer was either a couple or a few months. She left us with no grand illusions about the outcome.  And then, as if to cross the t and dot the i, she did something that told me more than any of her words could say.  She hugged me as she left the room.  We drove home from the hospital numb.

Gary is the most amazing man ever.  Each morning he rises, walks the dog, does his Buddhist chants, exercises the foot where he got dropfoot from the first intrathecal (spinal) injection of methotrexate, administered bedside by a physician’s assistant.  She hit a nerve.  Now he does all the exercises the Physical Therapists have given him, and it is getting better. He reads affirmations, listens to wellness tapes…everything to keep his spirits up.  Kindness and goodness, thy name is Gary Balogh.

In Gary’s sixth and final round of chemo, a pretty big medical error was made.  Two bags of chemo which should have run consecutively, were run concurrently.  They admitted their error, but Gary became quite ill from it.  He also, at the same time, got a bacterial infection from a peripheral blood draw.  A four day hospital visit turned into three weeks.  It was the first and only time Gary vomited during all of his treatment.  We contacted the ombudsman, but are not quite satisfied with how they did, or better put, did not handle the situation.

The next situation was the loss of confidence in our care, which set Gary into an almost catatonic mental state.  Everyone at home and at the hospital had noticed the difference.  We went to the hospital for blood, and they ended up admitting him for his mental state.  I will not elaborate on this, but with a team of psychiatrists and the right medications, the Gary we know and love was back quickly enough.  I, on the other hand, sank into a severe depressive episode.  I cried all day on many days, could not get out of bed, and had anxiety added to the list of my ills.  My family did a mini intervention.  My thanks to Stephanie for her help in getting me to enter an outpatient treatment program.  I am doing much better. 

The first attempt at harvesting Gary’s stem cells failed.  Part of me felt devastated, part of me glad to know that the thing I dreaded most would be put off for a while.

They Gave his body some time to recoup from the massive doses of chemo and the psychiatric state.  Next they told us he would be offered a compassionate trial.  The word “compassion”, in this case, stems from the fact that the patient is being allowed to use new, cutting-edge drug therapies without fitting into the clinical trial sample.  It simply refers to the fact that they are allowing him access to the therapy even though he is not a participant in the study.  Although they collected the stem cells, any use of them at this point is at the very least put on hold.

I am not going to talk much about Elijah, because he values his privacy at this age.  But my heart breaks for him.  At least he and his Dad are spending more time together than ever before, and for that I am grateful.

To my mother who withheld judgement when I am sure she had plenty she would have liked to have said, sometimes being an enabler is the right thing to do.  Thank you for your care for Elijah and all your help with driving Gary.  To Susan,  thanks for loving my husband and all that you did for him, from the driving to the little things like packing him lunch.  To Marlowe for your driving and Sandy for your blintzes.  To Bikur Cholim for the food…Sora you are amazing.  To Tebby and Jay and all my friends who are always there, and are probably sick of my tearfulness-I don’t know what I would do without you.  To our hero Priscilla, I wish I could think up a new adjective just for you, because none of the existing ones seem to be quite enough.

To my brother and Debbie, thank you for allowing Elijah to be a guest in your home for a month.  A very special month, indeed.

To my Dad and Ellen for allowing us the luxury of not having to worry about health insurance…I am appreciative every single day.

To my neighbors Kim and Phil, Brian and Julie, for helping with Eden, and for giving Elijah a soft place to fall.

Please continue to pray and to have hope.  Don’t forget about us.  To those we know an to the strangers who occasionally send a check, we are forever grateful.  I know I will love life again some day, but give me time. One small footstep at a time.  I may have forgotten somebody here, I promise if I have forgotten to thank anybody, that it may not have come out on screen, but I assure you that you are in my heart.

xxxooo

Jo-Ellen

 

Father’s Day Gift Wrapping at Borders

Borders at LaPlace was one of our donors for the benefit. Ernel, the store manager, put together books and bookmarks for one of our kids packages. He was so nice that Terry stopped by after the benefit to let him know how much we appreciated his kindness and also to let him know that the event was a success.

He took a moment with Terry and it turns out he, like so many other people we met, had a reason he wanted to get involved. Ernel used to work at Target and at lunch they used to go to Jack’s for sandwiches – he knew Gary!

Ernel offered the committee the opportunity to wrap books/presents at Border over Father’s Day weekend – they set up a table and made a sign saying that all tips would go to the Balogh Family Fund.

We had a good time wrapping gifts and connecting with even more of our community. Thank you to Ernel, Borders and to everyone who tipped so generously for our wrapping services.

Please note: Jo-Ellen has posted a Father’s Day update on Gary’s progress – click here to read it.

 

Thank You

There are not words enough to thank the community for their support tonight. Suburban Temple – Kol Ami was packed with friends and neighbors eager to offer their support to Gary, Jo-Ellen and Elijah. The event was an incredible success.

The committee wishes to extend their thanks again to our gracious sponsors and raffle donors – please support them as they have supported us.

We also want to extend a special thanks to Jay Marcus whose expertise in closing the deal resulted in our being able to offer such incredible raffle packages. Jay, you are a mensch, and we are proud to call call you our friend.

To Terry Marcus who recognized the need and moved heaven and earth to make tonight happen.

To Mindy Sussel, who in addition to having the coolest eyeglasses in town, scored some of tonight’s most popular offerings. Mindy, It was a pleasure to work with you.

To Beth Bass who was responsible for making tonight’s event pretty, tasty and musical. We are very grateful that you were with us to make this night special.

To Stephanie Novinc who put the wheels in motion and provided support even in her grief. Thank you Stephanie.

To Randy Wells whose unerring sense of style made tonight’s raffle table a thing of beauty. To Frankie Hochman who, with Randy, kept the raffle organized throughout the evening. Thank you for working so hard – we couldn’t have done it without you.

To Barbara Hochman and Robin Collins who manged the dessert service this evening – you were life savers. Thank you for pitching in and making sure the overflow crowd was served without delay.

To Pete Wells – you kept the line and money in order in a very efficient (and gracious) manner. You did a great job and we are very appreciative.

To Lisa Kollins who provided printed materials (and they were so pretty!) for us at the very last minute – you were lovely and a joy to be around. Now we know why your mother is so proud of you!

To Rabbi Bram, Loree Resnick and the superb staff of Suburban Temple-Kol Ami. Without your guidance and support this night would not have been possible.

Finally to Gary, Jo-Ellen and Elijah – tonight’s outpouring of love and support is a reflection of what you have given this community over many, many years. We love you and we are grateful to have had this opportunity.

JAC

 

An Evening in Support of the Balogh Family Fund

Today is the big day and we are so excited!

We hope you will join us.

Thank You!

Friends of the Balogh Family Invite You To:

An Evening in Support of the Balogh Family

Please join us for Desserts, Music, a Raffle and Lots of Fun

June 4, 2008 – Wednesday

7:00 – 9:00 p.m.

Suburban Temple – Kol Ami

22401 Chagrin Boulevard

Cleveland, Ohio 44122

Our friend, Gary Balogh, was recently diagnosed with an aggressive form of Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. A long time employee of Jack’s Delicatessen, Gary is no longer able to work to support his family. We, Gary’s friends, have established a benevolent fund at Keybank (The Balogh Family Fund) to help with the family’s expenses.

We ask you to join us in generously supporting the Fund through attending this event and/or contributing directly to the Fund. You may pay for the event or make direct donations to the Fund at any time by Paypal (click the button in the sidebar), or by mailing your checks, payable to Balogh Family Fund, to any Keybank or to Keybank at 2185 Warrensville Center Road, University Heights, Ohio 44118, or by visiting any Keybank in person.

Tickets: $25.00 Adults, $10.00 Children (12 and under)

Kids 3 and under free

Maximum $75.00 per family

Raffle Tickets $2.00 each, 3 for $5.00

RSVP: by email to baloghfamilyfund@gmail.com or by calling (216)464-6697

All proceeds from this event will go directly to the Balogh Family Fund.

Payment for the event can be made by clicking the make a donation button below.

Please remember to email or call to let us know you will be attending the event.

Raffle Extravaganza – Drawing will begin promptly at 8:15 PM

You must be present to win

Raffle Extravaganza

1. Girl’s Day Out

Enjoy your Girl’s Day Out with a Gift Certificate from Studio MZ for a manicure, blow dry and 30 minute massage, a $20 Stir Crazy Gift Certificate and Handmade Jewelry by Susan Goldfarb, Michelle Tarczy and Jenni Shelman Swarovski crystal bead necklace, bracelet and earrings.

No exchanges or returns.

2. Pampering and Paladar

You will feel pampered as a princess as you dine with a $50 Paladar – Eton Gift Certificate in your Mulholland & Sachs Handmade Peyote Bird Silver and Pearl Earrings after your Roza’s Naildresser’s manicure and pedicure.

No exchanges or returns.

3. I Don’t Do Windows

But Mark does! Your windows will sparkle and shine after Euclid Industrial Maintenance & Cleaning Contractors, Inc. finishes your outside window washing service. Bonus: handyman miscellanea courtesy of Cedar Center Hardware, one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

Good for any private residential home.

4. Stay Cool, Be Green

Your house will stay cool while you save green with a solar power attic fan, complete with installation courtesy of North Coast Insulation and Ventilation. Bonus: one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

5. You’re Worth It!

Reward yourself with a Faces by Hannah one hour facial, a $50 Nicholas Jewelers Inc. Gift Certificate and a $50 Bistro 185 Gift Certificate.

6. Take Me Out to the Ball Game

It is always a good day for baseball and your day will be perfect with an autographed Bob Feller baseball courtesy of Rabbi Eric Bram, an miniature Cleveland Brown’s helmet autographed by Bernie Kosar courtesy of Robert Markowitz, 4 box seats from the Cleveland Indians good for any remaining home game in the regular 2008 season, a $50 Gift Certificate from Jack’s Deli and a one year subscription courtesy of the Cleveland Jewish News. Bonus: one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

7. Right Up Your Alley

You will strike the right note with a Cosmic Bowling Party at Roseland Lanes for up to six guests includes 2 hours of unlimited bowling plus shoe rental courtesy of the Peleg Family.

8. Summer Gardeners

You garden will look lovely with a potted plant courtesy of Gali’s Florist and Garden Center, a Classic Haws Galvanized Steel Watering Can with Brass Rose, made in England – Filled with Dried Hydrangea Flowers courtesy of Smith & Hawken – Eton, his and hers Sunglasses courtesy of Berris Optical and one flat of impatiens and one yard of topsoil delivered with free grass cutting on the day of delivery. Bonus: one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

No exchanges or returns.

9. Shabbat

You will be ready for a sweet Shabbat with a $50 Tibor’s Gift Certificate, $25 Chocolate Emporium Gift Certificate, Star of David bundt pan courtesy of Cedar Center Hardware, Berger & Silver Jewelers creme porcelain cake plate (retail value $150) and a one year subscription courtesy of the Cleveland Jewish News.

No exchanges or returns.

10. Beauty and the Cheese

Your day will rock with this package featuring Beachwood’s own Ashleigh Wells’ just released The Hot Damn CD, two $20 California Pizza Kitchen Gift Certificates and a basket of fine beauty products courtesy of Mindy Sussel.

11. It’s a Good Life

You don’t have to be a dad to enjoy Father’s Day with this package including 5 La Aurora Robusto Cigars from Cousin’s Cigar, a $75 Gift Basket courtesy of Cedar Green Wine and Cheese, Dichroic Designs of Shaker Heights Wine Stopper and 2 tickets to the June 15th Cleveland Indians vs. San Diego Padres game courtesy of Barry and Caryn Hersch. Bonus: one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

No exchanges or returns

12. One Meal In, Two Meals Out

You will have the best of both worlds with this package featuring a sliced cooked brisket for 8 to 10 from Mr. Brisket, a $25 Hunan East Gift Certificate and a $50 Rick’s Café & Catering Gift Certificate. Bonus: one free service call for plumbing, heating and/or air conditioning and one free air conditioning cleaning courtesy of Sunview Plumbing Heating and Cooling.

No exchanges or returns

13. Lunch and Glamorous Work Out

You won’t mind working out with this package featuring a one month pass to Urban Active Fitness Center, a $45 Cheesecake Factory Gift Certificate and a necklace of green opals, malachite with copper clasp from Dichroic Designs of Shaker Heights.

No exchanges or returns

14. Surf and Surf

You can’t lose with this package featuring a $50 Sushi Rock Gift Certificate, a $50 McCormick & Schmick’s Gift Certificate and dichroic glass, black onyx and dichroic pendant necklace with sterling magnetic clasp from Dichroic Designs of Shaker Heights

15. Double Your Pleasure

You will double your pleasure with this package featuring 2 haircuts/blow drys with Renee at Le Salon at the Hamptons, 2 $25 Maggiano’s Little Italy Gift Certificates and a double strand necklace with sterling silver, swarovski crystals and dichroic pendant with sterling magnetic clasp from Dichroic Designs of Shaker Heights.

16. That’s a Stretch

You will see clearly, be strong, flexible and well fed with this package featuring a $150 Signature Optical Gift Certificate, 2 month individual membership, including 6 one hour long personal training sessions at Grunts Gym and a $50 Rick’s Café and Catering Gift Certificate.

17. It’s Sublime

You will be in heaven with this package featuring a wash, style and blow-dry, manicure and express pedicure courtesy of Sublime Salon and a $100 Flemings Prime Steakhouse Gift Certificate.

18. MMM MMM MMM …

This package is mmm- mmm – mmm great featuring a 3 month membership to the Mandel Jewish Community Center, a $50 Muldoon’s Gift Certificate, a $10 Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory Gift Certificate, a $5 Mitchell’s Ice Cream Coupon Book and a decoupage decorative plate courtesy of Three Sisters (Sandy Angart).

19. Story Time

Story time will be perfect with this package featuring a stuffed musical monkey from Sensational Celebrations, children’s books from Borders, sports theme bookends from Noteriety and sports theme piggy bank courtesy of Initially You Too .

No exchanges or returns

20. Family Fun

Family fun is in store with this package featuring 5 tickets, including parking pass, for the July 29th Lake County Captains vs Greensboro Grasshoppers game courtesy of the Blankfeld Family, a Big Fun Gift Box, a $50 Hunan By The Falls Gift Certificate, and $25 Cookies By Design Certificate.

21. Love and Lunch

You will love your week with this offering featuring a tennis package including a racquet and 2 hours of lessons courtesy of Brian Rubenstein, five $10 McCormick & Schmicks Gift Certificates, $5 Mitchell’s Ice Cream Gift Certificate and 5 $10 Howard’s Shoes Gift Certificates.

22. One From Column A and One From Column B

Dining pleasure awaits with this package featuring a four course dinner for two at Brio and a $25 Hunan East Gift Certificate.

23. Art

Your home will be graced by an original art work by Phyllis Seltzer.

24. We’ve Got You Covered

You’ll feel absolutely fabulous with this package featuring a shampoo, haircut, blow dry and assorted hair products courtesy of Ladies & Gentlemen, a $75 Moxie/Red Gift Certificate and a $25.00 Ricki Carr C. T Gift Certificate towards Electrolysis and Permanent Make-Up, CTR, Ear Piercing-Body Piercing.

25. Brotherly Love

Bringing it all together is this package hand selected by Gary’s brother, Mark Balogh, featuring a University Circle Arabica Coffee House Gift Certificate for 2 pounds of coffee of your choice and 2 specialty cheesecakes, a $50 Sergio’s/Sarava Gift Certificate and 2 $25 Brennan’s Colony Gift Certificates.

No exchanges or returns